The other night, I was making breakfast for dinner while on the phone with a friend. I left Jon to turn the bacon and watch the waffle iron while I finished my conversation. Simple tasks. When I came back into the kitchen, I instantly spied 1 piece of bacon laying on the paper towl. When I left the room, there was 6 pieces of bacon in the pan. I turned to accuse Jon and found a five year old boy standing there with his hand in the cookie jar. Instead of chocolate smeared, bacon grease shimmered around the corners of his mouth. He looked as if he himself was surprised at his Bacon feast, almost as if the Bacon attacked him in my absence, prying open his mouth and stuffing themselves down his throat. His look of defeat was arguably cute but given my hunger and length of my day, the boy was not free. I exclaimed my anger and bewilderment at the calculated action of eating 5 out of 6 pieces! How could he not think that I wanted some, that I deserved some? As you can guess the Bacon suddenly wasn't Bacon anymore. It was every little bothersome thing in life. Before eating we said a little prayer over the food which Jon offered. He was blessing all the proper things and I was nodding along, but mostly thinking about how mad I was that he left me one piece of Bacon. Suddenly I heard his voice change to the one that smiles. I peeked my eye open and sure enough,I found his eyes squinting due to the greasy smile spreading.
"And I'm really sorry for eating Kelsey's Bacon..."
Did he really just try to feign remorse in a prayer?
One squinty eye peeled open to see my reaction.
A little sacrilege.
But mostly much needed laughter.